So, I was having a conversation with a friend the other day about a situation that her friend is in (and yes people, this is someone's situation...it's not a roundabout way for me to avoid directly talking about my issues lol). To avoid directly putting her friend's business out here on the world wide web, I'll fudge the facts a little and give a name to our Anonymous Annie....so here's the hypo:
Diane is a single 29 year old college graduate. She's fairly successful in all realms of her life expect one area...love. See, she's been dating Tyrell for 3 years without a commitment. Diane is well aware of the fact that Tyrell is involved with other women and she is seemingly OK with that. Or is she?
Now analyze this situation ladies. I've met plenty of women in Diane's situation or a variation of her situation. I've even been in a variation of this situation. I wholeheartedly believe that you can't call this a relationship because it's not. It's a situation...that needs to be dealt with. The question is when. And really, that's up to Diane. No one can make her leave until she's ready. I'm not really a fan of Keri Hilson, but honestly every woman does have a breaking point. What's yours? When does the "status quo" stop being a enough and you realize that you're worth more than the situation you're in.
I'm in a relationship and we have our ups and downs, but at the end of the day he treats me the way I deserve to be treated and my status quo is what it needs to be. So, I couldn't really give my friend the right advice when she asked me what to tell her friend to make her realize that she deserves more. I mean...yeah, I was there once. I didn't realize I deserved better than what I was getting, but you couldn't tell me to leave. I truly believe at the point the fear of being alone got in the way of realizing the potential of what it could be like to be happy with someone who honestly loved me. Hindsight is 20/20 and if I were blasted back to 2005/06/07....well, my whole college years lol, I would smack myself in the face until I woke up and stopped being stupid! Yet, on the other hand I am a true believer in the quote that says something to the effect of "I never understood why it didn't work out with the others until I met you". Not being treated like I deserve helped me to appreciate the love that my booca showers me with on a daily basis...so in that sense, I don't regret anything.
However, that still doesn't answer the overarching question. If you are a woman in a situation that you know you're not happy in...ask yourself....when does the status quo stop being enough? Do you expect him to change one day and suddenly decide you're the perfect girl for him? (I typed that with a lot of sarcasm). Or are you just hoping that while you're in this situation you'll suddenly meet someone you are supposed to be with...someone who loves you and will care for you. I will warn you about this...while you're stupidly in love with this idiot who cannot appreciate you for the Queen that you are, you may be stupidly letting the King that God has predestined to be you husband slip through your fingers. Think about ending the status quo today.
Sex is not enough...you're never alone with God...Love is a word that comes and goes...Find someone who truly means and understands those four letters
And as always in parting...Grace and Peace be with you....Jesus is Lord!
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